Hot H2O
07-10-2003, 09:21 AM
A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and the officer walked up to the car.
The female police officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman "What does a driver's license look like?"
Irritated, the blonde cop said "You dummy, it's got your picture on it!"
The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman.
The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all this hassle."
http://www.checkmate-boats.com/6/ws/,s,8626072361/Graemlins/lol.gif--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Noticing a man who appeared to be really drunk, a few of the guys at the bar decided to be good Samaritans and help him get home.
They picked him up off the floor and dragged him out the door. The poor guy fell down three times on the way to the car.
Finding his house, they helped him out of the car and he fell down four more times on the way to his front door.
The helpful fellows rang the doorbell and the man's wife came to the door.
One said, "Here's your husband! We got him home safe and sound!"
The man's wife gave the group a shocked look. "But where the hell is his wheelchair?"
http://www.checkmate-boats.com/6/ws/,s,8626072361/Graemlins/bounce.gif
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A couple was watching a documentary on the Discovery Channel about an African tribe who's men all had penises 24 inches long.
When males reach a certain age, a string is tied around their penises and a weight is attached to the other end. After a while, the weight stretches the length of the penis to 24 inches.
Later that evening as the husband was getting out of the shower, his wife looked down at him and said, "Whadaya say we try that African string-and-weight procedure?"
Her husband agreed and they tied and string and weight to his penis.
A few days later, the wife asked the husband, "How is our tribal experiment coming?"
"Well, it looks like we're half-way there," he replied.
"You've grown to 12 inches?!" she said, astonished.
"No ... it's turned black," he answered.
http://www.checkmate-boats.com/6/ws/,s,8626072361/Graemlins/sick.gif
The female police officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman "What does a driver's license look like?"
Irritated, the blonde cop said "You dummy, it's got your picture on it!"
The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman.
The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all this hassle."
http://www.checkmate-boats.com/6/ws/,s,8626072361/Graemlins/lol.gif--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Noticing a man who appeared to be really drunk, a few of the guys at the bar decided to be good Samaritans and help him get home.
They picked him up off the floor and dragged him out the door. The poor guy fell down three times on the way to the car.
Finding his house, they helped him out of the car and he fell down four more times on the way to his front door.
The helpful fellows rang the doorbell and the man's wife came to the door.
One said, "Here's your husband! We got him home safe and sound!"
The man's wife gave the group a shocked look. "But where the hell is his wheelchair?"
http://www.checkmate-boats.com/6/ws/,s,8626072361/Graemlins/bounce.gif
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A couple was watching a documentary on the Discovery Channel about an African tribe who's men all had penises 24 inches long.
When males reach a certain age, a string is tied around their penises and a weight is attached to the other end. After a while, the weight stretches the length of the penis to 24 inches.
Later that evening as the husband was getting out of the shower, his wife looked down at him and said, "Whadaya say we try that African string-and-weight procedure?"
Her husband agreed and they tied and string and weight to his penis.
A few days later, the wife asked the husband, "How is our tribal experiment coming?"
"Well, it looks like we're half-way there," he replied.
"You've grown to 12 inches?!" she said, astonished.
"No ... it's turned black," he answered.
http://www.checkmate-boats.com/6/ws/,s,8626072361/Graemlins/sick.gif