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Wildfire Prevention Technique

Jimway

Well-known member
Yes, it's true my Brothers. This time of year, one must be careful with fire. Indeed, where I reside up here in the great Northwest, there are trees all over the place. One brief moment of concentration lapse with a flame ( or 'The Flame' ) and it's gonna look like Fire Marshal Bill has come to vacation for a week. Now some of you know that I have a neighbor that I call 'The Test Pilot from a Broom Factory'. She has voiced her unwanted opinion concerning the sound of ; the built 2.5 Merc in the Playmate, my truck, the 'Flame's 62 Chevy, the 'Flame's' small block powered Donzi, late night music around the fire pit, my general appearance and demeanor as well as some of the characters that hang around here, chainsaws, especially those above 100 cc's, and a whole bunch of other stuff I'm sure cause when I see her, her mouth is running pretty steady but I block some of it out, maybe even a lot of it. Now it has been pretty quiet since we sprang the 'Wereote' scheme upon her and her significant other. I have been keeping a weather eye out for her though. This time of year, the authorities establish a 'burn ban', and do their best to keep fires to a dull roar, even a null roar, if you will. You can imagine my surprise when I noticed a whisp of smoke coming from the 'Test Pilot's' ( Or should we shorten it to a more descriptive and shorter: 'TP' ?, like toilet paper. ) direction! With community spirit, concern, safety, awareness, and maybe even a little rascallyness abounbing, I hotfooted over toward 'TP's place and observed a camp type of fire burning right by the waters edge. I was immediately taken aback by this brazen breach of laws rules and regulation. If I were 'TP', I would call the Sheriff, Fire Department, Antipollution Department, Home Owners Association, Army, Navy, Marines, and Coast Gaurd, not to mention the Air Force. That, is not my way.
 
:popcorn:

Hmmm. I'm going to be in Kalispell Montana a couple of times this Summer/Fall. I'm awful tempted to wander over a state or two to see a few of these individuals and machines I'm reading about, The Shark, The Flame and T.P. but most of all Mrs. Jimway.:thumb:
 
You should have run over with a hose and wet eveyone I mean every thing down.
Only you can prevent forest fires.
 
Somehow, some way, whether by design, scheme, or mistake, there was, and is, a speed limit placed on the lake that I live upon. I know, yep, can you imagine? 5 mph! All of that water and nuthin but fishin skiffs with, gulp, electric motors. You might imagine that this travesty has not sat well with a guy that has a boat that idles at 6 mph. Returning to the fire situation, do you ever notice how the sun changes the grass to a brown color as soon as a few days after it finally comes out from behind the clouds? This brown grass can burn like the devil if fire can get a foothold on it. Lots of folks think it rains all of the time up this way and that's cool cause it keeps em away. Truth is, when old Sol finally shows up in mid July, he dries the place out, warms up the lakes, and if some inattentive type builds a fire in the tall grass right by the lake, if that fire gets the grass going, it's gonna move right into all of those dry pine trees with homes built all around underneath them and you're going to have a big problem. In fact, they're having that very same problem on the east side of the state right now. I think it's made the national news too. Seeing a foundation with a burnt water heater sticking up at the TP's place might not affect me the same way that seeing it at other spots around the neighborhood would. Now I have to tell you that any time I even think about getting out the grill, during the burn ban, to fire up some burgers, steaks, hot dogs, elk roast, or even some s'mores, I get a visit from the Sheriff or the fire Lieutenant, courtesy of a call from TP. You can imagine my surprise when I detected the rising smoke from the TP's direction. I trotted over to the vacant lot to get a better view. I stood there with hard peevish eyes, hands on my hips, mouth hanging partially open, feet apart, ready for immediate action, and viewed the scene. I lifted my right hand up and closed my mouth with it, putting my thumb on the right side of my jaw and the other fingers over on the left side. I surveyed the scene, a few pieces of firewood stacked into a triangle, flames crackling, no rocks around the fire to help contain it. No one around to monitor the flames. No hose nearby. No buckets of water present. I looked up toward the heavens for a brief moment and smiled, " This is what you call 'An Opportunity' I said out loud, to my self. I lifted my left foot off of the ground and stuck my hands out to each side like I was balancing on a narrow beam. I slowly swung around 180 degrees on my right toes so that I was facing toward home. Next, I'm pretty sure that I resembled 'Steve Austin' in the title scene of 'The Six Million Dollar Man' show where he is running along at approximately 70 mph.
 
'Opportunity' is defined as a circumstance or set of circumstances in which you can do something. Not too long ago, I viewed a video right here on this forum where a jet boat was used to extinguish a fire. If I remember correctly, in the video, this vessel was on fire and these other guys in a jet boat come by at 60 mph and use the water stream from the jet propulsion system of their jet boat to put out the fire. As I come running up my driveway, my neighbor, who has been reading the newspaper, tosses the paper down and says "What's goin on?" "Can you drive a stick?" I ask him. "Affirmative" he replies. So quick as can be, I open the garage door and hook up the Playmate to the Ranger, and we are off to a spot where one can back a boat trailer into the water and not be seen. I slip the transom straps off and jump up into the drivers seat and fire her up while my neighbor backs the boat trailer into the water. While I warm her up for a minute, I explain our exit strategy, then I back her off the trailer and spin her around and grab a whole lot of throttle.
 
Where I put in is just around a corner from TP's place. Maybe a couple hundred yards. I take the long way around the lake. Fishermen and some swimmers are quite surprised to see a speedboat hurtling across the lake. Several neighbors gaze out with looks on their faces ranging from mild humourous looks to mild shock. I wave. Some onlookers wave back. During the time it took to grab the Mate and splash it, the fire at TP's place has come along nicely. I roar up and using a clockwise motion, I douse the fire and a good portion of some other stuff. Just to make sure, I repeat the dousing a couple of more times. Don't want to leave any embers to cause future trouble. Since its really shallow by TP's back yard, I pull up off shore a ways and bring the Mate to a stop. I stand up, which isn't always easy in a rocking boat, and give a bow with my right hand upon my waist and my left arm outstretched. "Only You can Prevent Forest Fires" I say loudly and deeply. I twist the key and bump the starter. With a jet boat, one can spin quicky around in a circle and stay stationary. I demonstrate this attribute then a hole shot. I circle back across the lake, taking the long way again. Dare I say that it might just be the fastest vessel that the lake has seen so far. I slip into the little cove and drive right back onto the trailer. Neighbor has the truck idling, and reaches out and hooks the strap and safety chain to the bow eye and we are off to my driveway. I would have liked to play some Sinatra ( I did it my way ) but the stereo is on the disabled list. We put the vessel back into the garage and returned to the bench and newspaper. Done deal.
 
Boy, talk about stirring up a hornets nest. Sheesh. Some folks were a little upset from the firefighting effort. "I know, right?" I have had to make use of my Constitutional Rights (Yeah, the fifth one) so far. I would like to Thank those of you who like the story. There has been talk of tresspass, fines and restitution. I hope that this doesn't turn into one of those 'apology' things. How does that old saying go, 'No good deed goes unpunished?' I'm going to borrow a hose and nozzle from the back of the volunteer fire department and hook it up to the jet drive nozzle of the Mate and pull it around the neighborhood with a sign that states " Wildfire Prevention Committee".
 
With the addition of a few days for things to cool down, Seems that no one can positively ID the vessel in question ( The numbers were covered up by blue tape, Heh heh )( I heard it said 'Smokey the Jim' on the blue tape, written with a big marker)( the driver of the vessel had on one of those WW1 leather aviator helmets, so there is no positive ID there either ) The perpetrator never stepped on land so trespassing is out the door too. It does sound as if some food and computer gear may have become 'Collateral Damage' at the scene of the blaze. I don't think that that kind of stuff should be left out in the hot sun anyway.
 
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